Jesus Said Some Really Crazy Things

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In the previous post I quoted the Gospel of Luke in which Jesus told his followers to “hate” their fathers and mothers. Christians, of course, don’t believe that Jesus really meant to be understood literally in this passage. Jesus would never tell a disciple to hate his father and mother, they assure us.

Are they sure?

Let’s look at another statement from Jesus:

He that loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. 

–Matthew 10:37

Forget about your parents. What sane person would ask you to love him more than your son or daughter?? That is not rational, folks. That is crazy talk!

“But Jesus was God!” Christians will respond.

Hundreds if not thousands of mentally deranged people have believed themselves to be a god or a prophet. We don’t believe these nut jobs, so why should we believe Jesus?

Think about this: Why did Jesus’ first disciples believe him? Is it because he really did walk on water and really did turn a couple of fish into five thousand fish in front of their very eyes? I don’t think so. I think they believed Jesus’ crazy claims for one simple reason: They were living in terrible circumstances (Roman occupation) and were desperately looking for a rescuer, a savior, to deliver them from the Romans and to make their lives better and happier. Check out Jewish history. It is full of false messiahs promising the Jewish people deliverance from their occupiers!

Jesus offered hope. It was false hope. It was crazy hope. But it was hope, and that is why they believed him.

We have zero evidence outside of the Christian Gospels that Jesus performed any specific miracle mentioned in the Gospels. No non-Christian contemporary of Jesus wrote about any of his great public miracles (raising people from the dead, healing the lepers) nor of the fantastical events surrounding his alleged resurrection (earthquakes, angel sightings, dead saints roaming the streets, three hour eclipses, temple veil tearing down the middle, etc.). Think about this: If Jesus did all the miracles attributed to him by the Gospels, he would be the greatest Jewish prophet in the history of the Jewish people. He allegedly raised more people from the dead than all the prophets of the Old Testament combined! Yet not one non-Christian author bothered to mention these great Jewish events.

No, these events did not happen, folks. The magic-filled stories in the Gospels are the consequence of the whipped up hysteria of a desperately miserable people grasping for something, anything, to give their lives a little meaning and hope.

The stories of Jesus are ancient tall tales, my friends. They. did. not. happen! They should be taken no more seriously than the fairy tales found in the books of the Brothers Grimm, in which the poor are suddenly and marvelously blessed with great bounty or miraculous healing by a benevolent fairy godmother or other worker of magic.

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End of post.

10 thoughts on “Jesus Said Some Really Crazy Things

  1. Ehrman has said in books, blogs and Great Courses lectures, that some of Jesus’ more bizarre utterances make sense in an apocalyptic sense – that the end was near enough to reach out and touch.
    But of course everyone must note we are all here, two thousand years later. Since there are not very many Christians who can stomach the idea that Jesus could be wrong, they are forced to reinterpret what he said and change the meaning of words like soon, generation, near, etc.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. And every cult and sect who has ever predicted the End…and been wrong…has done the very same thing. They create ad hoc explanations for the failure of their “prophets”.

      Very often we desperately want to be right and hold on to certain beliefs, despite any evidence presented to the contrary. As a result, we begin to make up excuses as to why our belief could still be true, and is still true, despite the fact that we have no real evidence for what we are making up.

      Logically Fallacious website

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Here is a funny example of someone engaging in the Ad Hoc Fallacy (a fallacy Christians and other theists indulge on a daily basis!):

        Example #1:

        Frieda: I just know that Raymond is just waiting to ask me out.

        Edna: He has been seeing Rose for three months now.

        Frieda: He is just seeing her to make me jealous.

        Edna: They’re engaged.

        Frieda: Well, that’s just his way of making sure I know about it.

        Explanation: Besides being a bit deluded, poor Frieda refuses to accept the evidence that leads to a truth she is not ready to accept. As a result, she creates an ad hoc reason in an attempt to rescue her initial claim.

        Example 2, Christians using the Ad Hoc Fallacy:

        Christian: Jesus will return any day now to take Christians, dead and alive, to heaven.

        Skeptic: Jesus promised to return during the generation of his original disciples. He didn’t return.

        Christian: “Generation” doesn’t really mean “generation” in this context, just as “day” does not really mean “day” in the first book of Genesis.

        Skeptic: So when reading the Bible, words have no meaning.

        Christian: Only if you are an ignorant, God-hating atheist. If you would actually take the time to study the cultural milieu of the ancient peoples in which these stories developed, you would see very clearly the complex, nuanced meaning of these words.

        Explanation: Jesus didn’t mean to say what the Bible clearly says he said. I don’t buy it!

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  2. 2nd Peter 3:8 is another good example. Given the urgency of statements of both Jesus and Paul and character’s deeds in Acts, to then say a day for God is like a thousand years, so don’t worry that the end hasn’t come, God wants to save more people, is a cop out that should have ended the movement around the end of the first century.
    What was the point then of communication of the idea that the end is soon if it’s thousands of years away?There was no point in Paul and Jesus getting all worked up over it. The idea of divine accommodation that apologists are fond of using doesn’t work here as the concepts of soon vs thousands of years is easily understood. To then change to meaning to fit God’s perspective is a cop out.

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  3. “I quoted the Gospel of Luke in which Jesus told his followers to “hate” their fathers and mothers. Christians, of course, don’t believe that Jesus really meant to be understood literally in this passage.”

    avalos, hector argues in his book “bad jesus” that hate really does mean hate.

    i quote:

    “in fact, miseo is interpreted as the opposite of love virtually everywhere miseo and love are paired or encountered separately in the greek biblical texts”

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    1. And certainly Matthew 12:47-49 reinforces the notion he had no problems rejecting family. Imagine hearing someone say this today, you would instantly think “ brainwashed cult member!

      “ 47Someone told Him, “Look, Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to You.” 48But Jesus replied, “Who is My mother, and who are My brothers? 49Pointing to His disciples, He said, “Here are My mother and My brothers.…

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      1. Jesus was delusional, just as delusional as Mohammad, Joseph Smith, David Koresh, and every other human being who has come to the conclusion that the Creator of the universe has chosen him to be the Almighty’s spokesperson.

        Liked by 1 person

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