Did Jesus use a Tractor Beam once he Ascended into the Clouds?

As I explained here, if Jesus ascended all the way to Heaven at the speed from which he lifted off of earth and disappeared into the clouds above (the author of Luke and Acts claims that the disciples watched Jesus ascend so he was not traveling at the speed of light), then how did Jesus get all the way to Heaven by the time that Paul wrote in his epistle that Jesus was seated at the right hand of the Father?  As I have shown in a previous post, even if Jesus were traveling at the speed of light when he lifted off (which the Bible says he wasn’t), even today, Jesus would still be somewhere between earth and the Andromeda Galaxy, earth’s next closest galaxy!  He would be millions and millions of light years away from the far reaches of the universe, let alone Heaven.

So how can Christians “harmonize” these facts?

I’m still waiting for some desperate conservative/fundamentalist Christian to say this:

“You stupid skeptic.  It’s obvious.   Jesus lifted off slowly so that his disciples would know for sure where he went:  Up.  Up to heaven.  If he had simply disappeared, he could have gone anywhere.  So Jesus lifted off slowly to reassure his disciples that he went to heaven.  But once he got into the clouds, where they could no longer see him,…he pulled the “Tractor Beam” lever…and WHOOSH…he was teleported immediately to Heaven! 

You stupid skeptic!  Didn’t you ever watch Star Trek?”

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One thought on “Did Jesus use a Tractor Beam once he Ascended into the Clouds?

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